A Research and Practice Guide
ABIDING
Remaining in Christ, with creation, and compassionately present to experience
| Working definition. Abiding is a willing, embodied and relational remaining: staying present with God, oneself, another creature, or a difficult experience without grasping, fleeing, condemning, or surrendering wise action. |
This guide names and structures an ability Ross is already experiencing: abiding with a tree, abiding with pain, resting in “Pure Mind,” and remaining in Jesus during relationship distress. It brings together John 15, Christian contemplation, mindfulness and acceptance research, and nature connection. These perspectives illuminate one another, but they are not identical and should not be collapsed into a single theory.
Executive summary
In John 15, abiding means continuing in a life-giving relationship, pictured as a branch remaining in the vine. Its fruit is love, prayerful responsiveness, joy, and action—not withdrawal.
Experientially, abiding is less a special trance than a repeatable capacity to remain warmly present while sensations, feelings, thoughts, and circumstances change.
Abiding with pain means companionship with present experience, not approving the cause, refusing treatment, or forcing oneself to endure what is unsafe.
Abiding with a tree can be understood as attentive creaturely communion: receiving support from the senses, recognising shared life, and allowing creation to turn attention toward gratitude and care.
A complete practice ends in wise action. In the Brigitte example, Ross can abide with hurt and still clarify the remark, request respect, pause the conversation, and seek support.
ABIDING | RESEARCH & PRACTICE GUIDE
1. The biblical foundation: John 15
John 15 belongs to Jesus’ farewell teaching to his disciples. The central image is organic rather than mechanical: Jesus is the vine, the disciples are branches, and the Father is the vine grower. The branch does not manufacture life by effort alone; it receives life through connection. The instruction is mutual—“Remain in me, as I remain in you”—and fruit follows from this continuing relationship.
The Greek verb commonly discussed here is menō: to remain, stay, continue, or dwell. In the Johannine setting, the word takes on relational depth. Abiding includes remaining in Jesus, allowing his words to remain, remaining in love, and living the command to love one another. The test of abiding is therefore not merely an inward feeling of stillness; it is the fruit that appears in life.
| Theological centre. Abiding is receptive dependence joined to faithful participation. Grace supplies the life; the branch participates by remaining open, responsive, and loving. |
Four movements within John 15
| Movement | Meaning for practice |
| Remain | Return to relationship instead of trying to become self-sufficient. |
| Receive | Let life, love, word, and grace come before effort. |
| Be pruned | Allow what is unhelpful to be seen and released without self-condemnation. |
| Bear fruit | Let stillness become love, truth, boundaries, service, and wise speech. |
A Christian caution: John 15 does not teach that every painful circumstance should be passively tolerated. Remaining in Christ may require speaking truth, leaving an escalating exchange, seeking help, or protecting the vulnerable. Fruitful love is not self-erasure.
2. A phenomenology of abiding
Phenomenology asks what an experience is like from within. Ross’s descriptions suggest several recurring features. Abiding may feel like wakeful rest: awareness remains present to body and sound while striving softens. Attention becomes less narrow, the experience is permitted to exist, and a larger sense of presence holds it. There may be peace, warmth, vibration, tears, tension release, or no special sensation at all.
Stability without rigidity: remaining, but not freezing.
Contact without fusion: pain or criticism is present, but it is not the whole self.
Warmth without fixing: companionship precedes problem-solving.
Openness without exposure: awareness stays open while boundaries protect what is vulnerable.
Action without reactivity: response comes after contact, not from the first surge.
| A useful sentence. “This is here, and I am abiding.” The word and prevents either rejection (“this must not be here”) or fusion (“this is all there is”). |
3. Ross’s four modes of abiding
The following distinctions organise language Ross has already been using. They are practice lenses, not clinical or theological diagnoses.
| Mode | Primary gesture | Example phrase |
| Self Abiding | Embrace and care for body, emotion, thought, and vulnerable parts. | “Hurt is here; Ross will not abandon Ross.” |
| Pure Abiding | Rest as simple, non-grasping awareness without needing to alter experience. | “Breathing… Pure Mind… abiding.” |
| Soul Abiding | Receive experience as sacred and allow meaning, love, and conscience to speak. | “What is Love inviting now?” |
| Jesus Abiding | Remain in Christ and consent to being accompanied, guided, and loved. | “Jesus, abide in me; guide my words and silence.” |
The modes can overlap. If naming them becomes mentally busy, use only the simplest phrase that settles the body: “Jesus… abiding,” “Pain… and… abiding,” or no words at all.
4. The Abiding Arc
| Core sequence. Ground → Notice → And → Abide → Act. The first four movements create contact; the fifth protects agency and allows fruit. |
Ground. Feel feet, chair, breath, or a hand on the chest. Let the exhale lengthen gently; do not force relaxation.
Notice. Name only what is directly known: “tightness,” “hurt,” “anger,” “the thought that I am useless.”
And. Add a small bridge: “Hurt… and…” This makes room without arguing with the experience.
Abide. Stay for one to five breaths. Offer warmth: “This too belongs,” “I am here,” or “Jesus, remain in me.”
Act. Ask what protects love and truth now: listen, clarify, speak a boundary, obtain care, rest, leave, or contact support.
The arc can take ten seconds or twenty minutes. A short, honest practice is more useful than forcing a long spiritual state.
5. Abiding with a tree
A tree offers a living, non-demanding focus: rooted yet responsive, still yet changing, individual yet embedded in soil, air, water, light, fungi, animals, and human care. Christian ecological teaching describes creation as a community of creatures moving toward God, while research on nature-based mindfulness and nature connection reports associations with wellbeing and reduced distress. These findings support the practice as a helpful context; they do not mean every encounter will feel peaceful.
Approach with permission and simplicity. Choose a safe place and a tree that naturally draws attention.
Receive before naming. Notice colour, texture, light, motion, sound, distance, and the support of the ground.
Let the tree remain a tree. Do not require a message or imagine that it must heal you.
Sense relationship: “This life and my life are held within one creation.”
Rest for several breaths. If prayer arises: “Creator, let me receive and protect this gift.”
Complete the communion through care: gratitude, gentleness, litter removal, conservation, or simply leaving the place unharmed.
6. Meeting pain through abiding
Mindfulness and acceptance approaches generally aim to change the relationship to pain rather than deny it. Systematic reviews suggest small average benefits for pain and improvements in some quality-of-life outcomes, while also noting variation and limitations in the evidence. Abiding should therefore be used as supportive practice, not as a test of faith, a substitute for medical assessment, or a promise that pain will disappear.
| Pain formula. Sensation + warm space + wise care. Abiding reduces unnecessary struggle where possible, while wise care responds to the body’s actual needs. |
A 90-second pain practice
Orient: look around and name three neutral things. Confirm that the present setting is safe enough for practice.
Locate: where is the pain most clearly felt? Notice size, pressure, heat, pulsing, movement, or numbness without searching for perfect words.
Include: “Pain is here… and… abiding.” Allow surrounding neutral or pleasant sensation to remain in awareness too.
Companion: “Body, I am listening. Jesus, make this small moment with me.”
Choose care: change position, take prescribed medicine, contact a clinician, hydrate, rest, or continue gently.
Stop or shorten the practice if attention makes pain sharply worse, produces panic, unreality, collapse, overwhelming memories, or loss of orientation. Open the eyes, look around, move, speak to someone safe, and seek professional help when needed. New, severe, or medically concerning pain requires appropriate medical assessment.
7. Difficult-experience example: the hospital remark
Event: Ross hears Brigitte tell the nurse, “he cannot do anything.” Abiding does not decide in advance what she meant, and it does not require Ross to accept the remark. It creates enough interior room to separate the event, the bodily wound, the mind’s interpretation, and the next action.
| Movement | Ross’s possible practice |
| Ground | Feet on floor; one longer exhale; feel the phone in the hand. |
| Notice | “Hurt in the chest. Embarrassment. Anger. The thought: she sees me as useless.” |
| And | “Hurt… and… Jesus abiding. Anger… and… room around anger.” |
| Abide | Stay for three breaths: “Ross will not abandon Ross.” |
| Discern | Is this the time for the practical list, a clarification, a pause, or later conversation? |
| Act | “I heard what you said to the nurse and felt hurt. What did you mean? I want to help, and I need us to speak respectfully.” |
| Boundary principle. Abide with the pain; do not abide in contempt. Remain in Christ and in self-respect, then choose the boundary that protects truthful relationship. |
8. A daily rhythm of abiding
| Time | Practice | Brief wording |
| Waking | 3 min | Feel the body in bed; receive the day before planning. | “Here… breathing… Jesus abiding.” |
| Morning | 10 min | Sit in silence; use Self, Pure, Soul, or Jesus Abiding. | “I consent to Love’s presence and action.” |
| First tree or sky | 1–5 min | Pause outdoors or at a window; receive one living detail. | “Creation is here; I belong and I care.” |
| Transitions | 1 breath | Before calls, driving, meals, or entering a room, feel the feet. | “Ground… abide… enter.” |
| Difficulty | 10–90 sec | Use the Abiding Arc before reacting. | “This is here… and… abiding.” |
| Midday | 2 min | Ask what has been carried too tightly. | “What may I release? What needs action?” |
| Evening | 5 min | Review fruit rather than performance. | “Where did love, truth, or courage grow?” |
9. Seven-day gentle training
Day 1 – Body. Three one-minute pauses: feel support and say, “I am here.”
Day 2 – Tree. Abide with one tree for five minutes; write three sensory details.
Day 3 – Emotion. Name one feeling, add and, and remain for three breaths.
Day 4 – Pain. Use the 90-second practice with mild or familiar discomfort.
Day 5 – Jesus. Pray with John 15: remain, receive, love, bear fruit.
Day 6 – Relationship. Rehearse one warm boundary while grounded.
Day 7 – Integration. Choose the smallest daily rhythm that feels sustainable for another week.
10. Discernment: abiding or self-abandonment?
| Healthy abiding | Possible self-abandonment or shutdown |
| More contact with body and surroundings | Numbness, unreality, collapse, or losing time |
| Greater freedom to choose | Feeling compelled to endure or appease |
| Warmth joined with truth | Spiritual language used to deny anger or injury |
| Boundaries become clearer | Boundaries repeatedly postponed to keep peace |
| Fruit includes courage and care | Practice leaves Ross smaller, ashamed, or isolated |
If the right-hand pattern becomes common, shorten contemplative practice, re-orient through movement and ordinary activity, and speak with a trusted clinician, spiritual director, counsellor, or safe friend. Abiding should enlarge freedom and loving agency over time.
11. Reflection and documentation
What did I abide with today: body, emotion, thought, tree, pain, Jesus, or another person?
What changed: intensity, spaciousness, meaning, or nothing noticeable?
Did I become more present and free, or more passive and shut down?
What fruit followed: patience, truth, boundary, kindness, rest, repair, or asking for help?
What phrase felt honest rather than forced?
What would a smaller, gentler practice look like tomorrow?
| One-line record. Trigger → body → abiding phrase → wise action → fruit. Example: “Hospital comment → chest hurt → ‘Hurt and Jesus abiding’ → asked for respectful clarification → remained steady.” |
12. Research interpretation
The sources support several modest conclusions. John 15 strongly grounds abiding as sustained communion with Christ that bears relational and ethical fruit. Christian contemplative teaching describes silent prayer as consent to God’s presence and action. Mindfulness and acceptance research supports learning a less reactive relationship to pain, though average effects are generally modest and evidence quality varies. Nature-based mindfulness and nature connection are associated with wellbeing, but causality, individual response, and study quality vary. Ross’s specific four-mode framework and Abiding Arc are an integrative practice formulation developed from his lived experience; they are not established clinical protocols.
Selected sources
Scope note: This guide is educational and spiritual. It does not diagnose a condition, replace medical or psychological care, or advise remaining in an unsafe situation.
United States Conference of Catholic Bishops, John 15:1–8 (text and vine/branches context): https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/042824.cfm
Catechism of the Catholic Church, communion with Jesus and the image of vine and branches: https://www.usccb.org/catechism/pt1sect2chpt3art9p2
Contemplative Outreach, “The Goal of Centering Prayer” (consent to God’s presence and action): https://www.contemplativeoutreach.org/2020/06/19/the-goal-of-centering-prayer/
Contemplative Outreach, “Centering Prayer and the Breath”: https://www.contemplativeoutreach.org/2020/10/29/109468/
Pope Francis, Laudato Si’ (creation, contemplation, and communion): https://www.vatican.va/content/francesco/en/encyclicals/documents/papa-francesco_20150524_enciclica-laudato-si.html
Djernis et al. (2019), systematic review and meta-analysis of nature-based mindfulness: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6747393/
Jimenez et al. (2021), review of nature exposure and health: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8125471/
Hilton et al. (2017), systematic review of mindfulness meditation for chronic pain: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5368208/